The Power of a Buddy or Tribe is immense. As a counsellor walking alongside others we often will explore who can be a support person. I am aware that there are many supports and right now I am speaking about those who get you, who are like minded, who would be your cheer leader.
Over the years I have noticed that sometimes these cheer leaders can come from places you would never have expected, especially if you are in transformation, changing what you believe about yourself. particularly if there is change from not feeling good enough or not deserving to noticing yes I am worthy, I am deserving and I am actually be more than good enough.
In the counselling or coaching conversation there is usually a point where we have to have the hard conversation that perhaps our current social circles, friends or even family may not quite enjoy the transitions that we are making not because anyone is good or bad it is what it is and these are the times that we need to tap into the energy of a buddy, a tribe who gets us.
So for example if you are no longer drinking the way you used to and you get – oh go on have a drink you are more fun, or if you are listening to your body in terms of feeling hungry, feel satisfied and someone says don’t be miserable have a piece, go on eat it and/or if you look after your wellbeing through exercise, sleep, creativity, time out etc anyway that is different this is only one step the next is to trust that you are on track for you and may need a buddy or a tribe who understands what this means to you and can support you so that you can choose the right action, behaviour that fits with your own values, with what is important to you.
In time others may not get you or may not do what you are doing but we can give them time to catch up, if they decide that you are no longer right for them, then perhaps we don’t and it is time to move on if this does not serve you living your best life. Just know that this all needs time to process with tenderness and compassion until we all get used to the new way of being. It is not easy if it is our partner, family or close friends that may struggle but it is possible. All you need to know is that whatever these new changes are, if you are feeling better than you have then it is right of YOU, you deserve making a compassionate stand for you.